I am so tired

My mother in law and her sister (aunt in law?) are in town. I think they are leaving tonight, but I’m not positive. They got in on Saturday, but we didn’t see Pam till 10PM b/c they crashed at the hotel (they drove down, we weren’t expecting them till past 10 anyway). We cleaned from 8AM – 3PM Saturday – big clean, not superficial it’s good enough for us clean.

Sunday we got up early as fuck, Michael got bagels, we ate with the boys before they went to Hebrew school, ate with Pam & Susie, picked up the boys from school, ate lunch, came home, decided not to go to the beach (it was very hot out), hit Target (whoohoo Target! totally warranted, my menfolk needed shoes), ordered pizza and came home to eat. We all hung out outback in between lunch & Target.

Today we went to the post, Michaels, then Festival. Picked up the boys, Michael is at the shop with the two of them so they can get some tattoos and I need to make dinner. Then we need to go *back* to Target so Pam can return something and so she can get something for the boys. We didn’t find anything for her to get them this morning. I say the don’t need more crap, but she gets them stuff and sees them so rarely… at least it’s stuff I don’t have to buy them lol Dor wants those Wolverine claws and Malachai wants a movie. Eshiva got jelly shoes last night (they’re still jellies, right?)

I just want to go to sleep. It takes a lot out of me to be in “company” mode, especially day after day. I crashed in the carpool lane at school and I’d like to go back to sleep.

Ok, my sexy beast of a man decided to get, well, beastly last night, so that didn’t help me in the sleep department (but it was much appreciated) but I still say company mode just drains me.

Sexual Orientation

There’s a discussion going on over at Punky Moms right now about Dumbledore and his gayness. Hmmmm… recipe for disaster or innocuous discussion?

Before I get to that, I want to say, I don’t proclaim my sexual orientation. Why not? It’s none of your business, that’s why not. I support anyone who wants to shout from the rooftops they are hetero, homo, poly, pan, trans, or anything I may have missed. I support their desire and their right. It’s just not for me.

I’m not on the market. I’m not playing the field. I’m not looking for a booty call, nor do I have the desire to be someone else’s booty call.

So it’s moot.

Someone mentioned that they support gay rights, have gay friends, but do not want their child around gay people because they might influence them to be gay. I’ll wait while you read that again. Slowly. All done? OK then. On the other side of the fence, we have a bundle of riled up ladies who identify as lesbian or bisexual, or have family members who identify as homosexual and are offended by said persons comment because hey, it could be their home that person keeps their kids from coming to because they could be a bad influence. Yes, tell a bunch of mothers you don’t want your child near them because they are bad people.

It’s actually been handled very well, and wasn’t a huge, heated discussion. I simply had this to say, about 25 posts in:

I really want to applaud our mamas for seeing this is a matter of opinion and not a matter of shoving ones opinion down ones throat as fact.

Personally, my kids already know (to some degree) about all sorts of relationships because they’ve been exposed to them. Whether they acknowledge consciously yet or not, they know about it, and I think it’s a good foundation.

Of course, my son likes to put on Shivies dress up clothes and play with her, who am I to stop them? It isn’t hurting anyone, and it makes for some cute, if not shared, photos. Not shared because not everyone thinks it’s innocuous, and that’s fine too.

Yep, my son likes to dress up right along side his sister. Usually in a pink tutu. I really don’t care. I think it’s sweet that he doesn’t have societies morals being pushed on him and is free to express himself.

I’m veering off-course here. Back to the subject at hand. I don’t share my sexual orientation anymore. I said why. Maybe if I was looking for someone I would be sharing it, but the people who need to know, do, and the people who don’t need to know, don’t. It doesn’t impact my relationships one way or the other.

If I said I was a lesbian or bisexual or poly or pan, that wouldn’t mean everyone I look at I see as a conquest or future partner or possible partner any more than if I say I’m straight. I have some female friends who are gorgeous, but that doesn’t mean I am looking at them like a plaything. It means I am looking at them as a person, a beautiful one. Same for my male friends. I have one male aquaintance who for years I’ve enjoyed looking at. That doesn’t mean I am gonna proposition him.

So why make a big deal out of gay, straight or in the middle? Just because you stick a label on it, doesn’t mean it’s all about sex. It’s about love, and companionship and sharing something with someone that you are so close and connected to, no one else will ever fit the hole they leave when they are gone. Sex might fit in there, but it’s not the be all end all.

Oh, you want real news?

You down with ODD? Yeah you know me!
Sorry, I couldn’t help it.

Met with the doc yesterday morning. We have an official dx of Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) and a maybe on Sensory Integration Disorder (SID).

Malachai scored in the 97th percentile general conceptual and reasoning ability. He scored in the 1st percentile for adaptive behavior composite (mild deficit), but we were assured that a “low” score was really along the lines of 0.01% (being autism) so 1% isn’t as bad as it looks on paper. Not that that made seeing him at 1% any better, but at least the doctor explained the spectrum they are looking at. Why not start it at 1%, I don’t know.

We’ll be calling to get an appointment with a pediatric neurologist for initial psychological testing for a developmental delay. She said to mention to them on the phone that he has a deficit in social/emotional functioning, communication skills and motor skills.

We were recommened a book called Your Defiant Child by RUssell A Barkley/Christine Benton as well as 1-2-3 Magic, and you’ve heard me tout the magic of 1-2-3 Magic before. It doesn’t work on Malachai and she said it only worked with about 83% of kids, and wasn’t surprised it worked for one of our kids but not for M.

She also reassured us it wasn’t *our* parenting, because we’d be more likely to have three children with “problems” instead of just one.

I am on a reading rampage. I’ve finished recently The Memory Keeper’s Daughter, The Time Traveler’s Wife, For a Few Demon’s More, and there was another on in there as well. I have started another book yesterday, and I have a few more to dive into.
I’ll be getting my laptop fixed soon, thankfully. I had been hoping to send it off today, but apparently I paid my credit card a day early so now I am considered late, and while they did remove the late fee, my card is still frozen until I pay them again. Fuckers. I was going to send it to Apple, but now I am scared I’d wind up paying them 100$ to send it back b/c I wont pay them to fix it. So I found (ok, I was pointed to) a place that will repair it for half of what Apple will charge. I could buy a new freaking monitor for 1/3 of that, but then I wont have a laptop anymore, which sucks b/c we have no place to put another desktop set up. Yes, I entertained actually doing that, it was my idea in fact,  but I just can’t do it. Michael said any of the options will piss me off (losing laptop functionality or paying out the ass for repairs) so I may as well go with the one that will give me what I want in the long run.
Had the best sex last night. You don’t care, I know. We had been going at it like bunnies for a while there, and then I was done, so we stopped. Last night was lovely. It was more than lovely, but that is my fake Brit decorum poking through. So it was lovely.
The kids go back to school tomorrow. Pesach was uneventful this year. Dorian spent the first three days with a friend, Malachai had that ear infection. We didn’t do anything. My moms birthday is April 19th. It usually falls in Pesach. I still have an angel food cake (no flour) mix I was going to make her last year. I am not regretting not making it, but it makes me a little sad. It just sits in the pantry looking back at me. So Pesach was a no-go this year. I’ll probably make up for it next year. This is the first year I haven’t done anything, which is kind of weird to me. I mean, we were saying the prayers all week, Dorian was singing them with me. I find myself singing Jewish prayers and songs to myself more and more often. I don’t know if it’s because Dorian and Malachai are singing them (because they are learning them… it always shocks them when I start singing with them) or something deeper. I am still at odds with the concept of belief.

I changed hosts, which is why I’ve been missing.

I got the prayer shawl in the mail todya, that Kasie made fo rmy mom. It’s beautiful, and she loves it.
Yay on two counts!

I also got the one inch buttons, so I need to do up the wording and get them posted.

CCC is making a comeback, more on that later.

Got a new washer yesterday. The guy is coming back today to sort of fix the dryer, but we need to have someone come out to clean the lint out of the pipe. Right now the hose is just unattached with a towel by it to catch the lint that might come out. But the dryer is drying in one cycle!

Tomorrow is the picnic, I need to make some cookies. Monday we’re setting up the bouncehouse, and from 1 – 3 we’re knitting with the HS group. I hope we can chat about spiral scouts too. I want to get that set up soon.

Oh yah, TMI ahead, so I’m hiding it. [Read more...]

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