I have a few WP installs, and between them all, I use

• adsense now
• advanced excerpt
• akismet
• category order
• comment luv
• count per day
• hebrew date
• kb countdown widget
• lj cross poster
• my page order
• please link 2 me
• quotes collection
• sharethis
• shockingly simple favicon
• simple feed copyright
• simple tags
• time machine
• tinyMCE advanced
• twitter for wordpress
• updated today banner
• wordpress auto upgrade
• wordtwit
• wp-relative date
• page mash
• print me
• wp auto suggest
• limit posts
• Blog Copyright (by BTE)
• WPtouch iPhone Theme
• no disposable email
• cforms
• phplist
• popularity contest
• role manager
• vox crossposter
• buddy press (and related plugins)
• all in one seo pack
• hackadelic sliding notes
• simple tags
• statpress reloaded
• wpg2

I also have a wordpress mu insall, so I have a few related plugins there too. So… what can’t you live without? What can you live without? Share the link love!

Sunday we got up early as fuck, Michael got bagels, we ate with the boys before they went to Hebrew school, ate with Pam & Susie, picked up the boys from school, ate lunch, came home, decided not to go to the beach (it was very hot out), hit Target (whoohoo Target! totally warranted, my menfolk needed shoes), ordered pizza and came home to eat. We all hung out outback in between lunch & Target.

Today we went to the post, Michaels, then Festival. Picked up the boys, Michael is at the shop with the two of them so they can get some tattoos and I need to make dinner. Then we need to go *back* to Target so Pam can return something and so she can get something for the boys. We didn’t find anything for her to get them this morning. I say the don’t need more crap, but she gets them stuff and sees them so rarely… at least it’s stuff I don’t have to buy them lol Dor wants those Wolverine claws and Malachai wants a movie. Eshiva got jelly shoes last night (they’re still jellies, right?)

I just want to go to sleep. It takes a lot out of me to be in “company” mode, especially day after day. I crashed in the carpool lane at school and I’d like to go back to sleep.

Ok, my sexy beast of a man decided to get, well, beastly last night, so that didn’t help me in the sleep department (but it was much appreciated) but I still say company mode just drains me.

Michael mentioned yesterday that Malachai is finally developing a personality of his own. He brought up how it was sort of blunted before, you could interact with him, but there wasn’t anything about it that screamed, this is me, I am Malachai.

He loves Alice Cooper. He wants to dress up like him for Halloween. He loves scary movies and fast rides. I kind of attribute part of that to his sensory issues (if he needs BIG input physically it makes sense he’d love roller coasters and stuff, and if he needs it physically, why wouldn’t he need BIG input mentally too? So scary stuff = more input to his brain) but it’s giving him and Michael something way cool to bond over.

He said something yesterday and I can’t remember what it was (Michael told me I should have posted then and there lol Silly me for not doing it) but it was what brought on this conversation. He might be coming up on seven, but he is finally turning into… himself. It is giving me great joy to see it happen. Dorian had his own personality around 3 or 4, and Eshiva is loaded with personality, but Mal… he was just kind of rolling along. Now he pops up with little quips and stories and is fierce about what he likes and doesn’t like and what he does and doesn’t want to do and why (as opposed to being engrossed in one thing and woe be unto you if you tried to do something else).

It’s not all sunshine and roses, but this is just amazing to me.

Eshiva just came up to me with a picture of Erin that is in a red heart frame.

She told me “Mommy, this is my love”

I asked if she knew who that was (of course not) and I told her.

She said “I love her, can I put this on the piano?”

I said of course. She’s carrying it around telling everyone she loves her, this is part of my love too. She’s a part of my family.

Malachai is telling her that she (Erin) is dead, and two people in our family are dead.

Eshiva is telling him she isn’t dead, she is a part of our family. T

They are going back and forth. It’s cute.

<3

Eshiva is named for Erin (for those who don’t know). She died in 03, Shivie never knew her (obviously) – I don’t know that Malachai even remembers her.

She just came up to me to tell me Erin is dead, but we love her and she is still a part of our family and we have a picture of her when she was alive.

This is from my friend Sam, and her story just breaks my heart. She has had one thing after another in her family, and it hits just too close to home to not effect me. I am not going to share her back story, it’s not mine to share. Suffice to say, she is just an amazing woman and I have a lot of respect for her and her entire family.

Walk for Savannah!, okay, its really a walk for arthritis, but we’re egotistical
Cut & pasted from the lame-o email I just sent out…….

It’s that time of year again!

As you know, having arthritis has greatly affected Savannah’s life. This is a way for her to take some control of her disease and have some fun in the process.

The walk is being held at Battery Park on Sunday, April 25th at 10am.

We had a fantastic walk last year and I’d like to see even more of you participate this year. It means SO much to Savannah. It’s a great outing for a great cause in a beautiful place. If you’ve walked with us before, you know how much fun we have. If you haven’t…well it’s time you did! Please do your very best to join us…and bring your friends, co-workers and neighbors. The more the merrier! Hope to see you there.
Here’s her team page:

http://batterypark.kintera.org/2009/teamsavannah

If you can’t come please consider making a donation smile.gif And please feel free to forward her Team Page to your friends. We can use all the help we can get!
Thank you
-Sam

He pulled his old trick of falling over standing still this morning. It’s become quite rare, so Michael was surprised.

We’ve dropped the ABA lady to once a month, which is mainly to check in and see if anything new pops up.

Courtney (his private speech gal, he also sees Kendra twice a week for 30 minutes each) is working with him on the telephone. She is doing his normal speech stuff for the first 20 minutes or so, and then works on the phone. I send a couple of old cell phones in, he loves playing with them. She is trying to get him to play out a phone conversation. This is a typical Malachai phone experience:

The phone rings.
Malachai ignores it.
Malachai, the phone is for you (and I hold it out to him), it’s soandso.
Malachai shies away from the phone, puts his head kind of to the side, simulating feotal position, but without using his entire body to get into it. He also starts to back away, regardless of what is behind/beside him that he may bump into.
I then explain (as gently as possible) to soandso that Malachai doesn’t want to use the phone right now and can he try and phone back later?

It’s a whole huge process where nothing actually gets accomplished. He does this with the fake phone play acting as well.

Courtney is going to talk to some of her colleagues between now and next Wednesday, but in the meantime suggested I find some books about the phone. I have been looking for useful social scripts all week, but she also suggested books about when the phone was invented, how it works, etc.. As it is, I am a dork and have books from when I was a kid that cover topics just like that! Score! I even know where they are, go me! Malachai loves to read, as long as you don’t realize he is reading, and loves science (he wants to build a time machine when he grows up). So, we’re moving at the speed of a sloth, but we’re moving just the same.

I wrote a letter to whoever it goes to about his aid for next year. I am really proud of my letter. I am quoting it below, feel free to use parts of it if you need something similar. I wrote it at the urging of our ESE gal, not that it will absolutely help, but it certainly can’t hurt (her words).

[quote]To Whom It May Concern:,
I am writing this letter to express how helpful I feel the personal aid has been to my son, Malachai Jxxx, this school year.

His schoolwork has markedly improved since he has had access to an aid for a portion of the day. Not only does he bring completed papers home (something that he has trouble doing on his own) but they usually have all the correct answers as well. I have seen the spelling tests and language tests he brings home; Often he will get maybe 3/10 correct when he takes the test with the class, but 9 or 10/10 when he takes the test one on one with the aid.
While I do not feel Malachai needs a personal aid for the full day, I do feel he would benefit greatly from receiving this one on one time again during the next school year.

Malachai also receives outside speech and occupational therapies and has just come so far this year. I would like to see this upward curve continue.
[/quote]

The requisition papers were due this week, so it had to be in ASAP. His IEP is scheduled for September of next school year, but Ellen (ESE) is going to try and do it by the end of this year so his current teacher has input, not a teacher who doesn’t know him.

I’ve also requested he not have the teacher that Dorian has this year as I think it will be a really bad match. She asked who I did want him to have, but I have no idea. The teachers I knew from when Michael & Sara went there are not the teachers who are still there. I told her I trust her judgement, and please keep him out of Mrs. Vxxx’s class.

Wow, what a post. Here is what I really wanted to ask about, thanks for making it this far!

We’re going to Disney in April. I used all the money I made in January/February to buy tickets for all eight of us. I am going the weekend of my moms birthday because it will make my dad happ(ier) than he would be sitting at home all weekend being depressed. I understand Disney handles special needs differently now than it did when I was a kid, and differently than Universal does now. I know I need a note from the doctor on their letter head (I am going to ask for one tomorrow when I pick up D’s referral), but does anyone know if I need anything else?

I don’t abuse it, Mal can handle short waits and we can usually distract him in most lines. It’s those hour+ lines that we can’t do it on. (Can you tell I have guilt over it? This from a kid who never, ever waited in line because she was with the wheelchair party.) It helps us in restaurants and some other sit-down type attactions as well.

I am planning this trip to see shows and stuff that we usually don’t see, so I’d like to know if there is anything I should take into consideration for or about him. We’re Disney veterans. I know not to spend the entire day there, and to make dinner reservations and all that stuff. Last time we were there was a couple of years ago and things change, including him, and I am probably making a bigger deal than it is, but a couple of hours after we arrive I get irritated and am ready to leave because I haven’t planned well enough. I’d like to avoid that. We will not be staying anywhere near the parks this time, so heading back to the hotel for an hour breather and going back isn’t an option.

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Sorry for the blur – but red!

I’m not really this pale (I don’t think) – I busted the front screen on my phone and I think it busted my camera too

There is actually red, pink and orange, but it’s still wet and you can’t really see it yet.

• Eshiva, because she just told me “Yay Mommy! Yay Mommy! You opened it!” because I opened her bagel. Then she told me I am a genius, for the same reason.
• my new jeans from Old Navy, because they aren’t “low-cut” and I don’t feel like a fat ass in them
• my new dog, because she really did “come” paper trained (unlike the last one we had that was supposedly trained)
• my laptop (ok, this is my favourite everyday) because I can work from bed. Naked!
• our Wii, because it has everyone in the living room playing together, which is pretty cool (unlike the other gaming systems we have/have had in the past)

I really think #1 wins lol What’s on your list today?

I have to take the twins to the doctor this morning, then run their forms over to the high school to get S registered.

Michael is going to take the dog to the vet (along with the kids… maybe I will take one of them with me…) if I am not home in time to do it myself.

I have some work to do today. I want to spend some time with the kids too. I feel like I am already running behind, and it’s barely after 8.

For those who want to read about yartzeit, you can do so here, but the quick n dirty, it’s the anniversary of a death.

We took Sara to register her to school this morning, and I have work to do. It just hit me that today, it’s been four years. I need that tattoo. My whole life revolves around it.

Today is probably the day
and Here is my blog from that day

and the next year

I didn’t blog in 2005

we were settling into our new home last year, and I did light yartzeit, but didn’t blog

I might post this as my blog entry this year… I am so tired of commemorating death, but I feel wrong not acknowledging the life that was lost.