Posts Tagged "child"
Shiva turned four yesteday
I am feeling kind of ambivalent about my youngest turning four. I do not look at pregnant ladies with longing for another baby. In fact, I am thrilled to not be making any more babies, ever. I am thrilled to be done with diapers (until my own incontinence) and baby food and strollers and slings and blunted plastic utensils.
But my baby turned four. She is right around the corner from not needing me home all day long. She is far from not needing me, I am aware of that. It’s just different with her than it was with the boys.
I know she is the last one. I enjoyed her babyhood more. I wasn’t chasing after a toddler, or missing out on toddler things because I was looking after a baby. I was not looking after someone who was sick and/or dying. I wasn’t moving (ok, we moved a few times) or packing/unpacking for months at a time (we stored the unpacked boxes).
I didn’t do anything for this birthday. We have no friends with young children (indeed, we have no friends) and she isn’t in any programs and therefore had no little friends to invite. My dads mom and sister came over. My moms parents were in Naples – we’re going to go see them next weekend. We had steak and knishes and salad and trifle and cake. We took her out to sushi the next day, because the plumber was here on her actual birthday.
I convinced her she really is four, and today convinced her that her birthday is over, but she is still four. I took some photos (which I haven’t unloaded).
And that was that.
Next year, school? Maybe, maybe not. Apparently VPK is only a 3 hour day through the public school. What a waste of time. I may keep her home. She doesn’t make the cut off for K next year.
Read MoreCPSIA isn’t the only problem. Apathy is as well. Do something
Redistributed with permission from Immature Couture: http://immaturecouture.blogspot.com
The following happened today when I had to go out and grab some groceries for the kids and I. The past couple of months have been a whirlwind for me as most of you know. I ended up giving Kimi a few things and she was happy that she got one of the Gothic Lolita inspired outfits she helped me make/design. I wanted to share this blog with you because it really fucking hit me today… this is going to have an insane impact on so many things. We ALL as parents are going to be affected. Not just those of us that are running businesses. Take some time to read about what is going on with the CPSIA and decide for yourself if you think this law is beneficial. I personally want my kids to always be able to go into libraries, buy handmade goods that are not mass-marketed and appreciate the extra touch of a handmade blanket.
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“Your outfit is absolutely adorable!” I heard a woman say behind me and my daughter replied with, “Thank you! My Mommy has a clothing business!” and I sighed. Sighing is not my usual reaction when I get a compliment for my work. The woman and her sister were very polite and had no idea that they had just brought to surface so many terrible feelings with their compliments, “You made her outfit? It’s amazing! You really have talent and I’ve never seen anything so adorable.” They didn’t have kids but talked about how they almost wished their biological clocks started ticking simply to shop for my line of clothes. I was completely flattered but almost muted because of the recent decision to close up my Immature Couture shop. When they asked where I sold my clothes I didn’t have the energy to explain what was going on so I simply said “Online.” thanked them and went back to grocery shopping with the kids.
I want nothing more than to know that the toys my children play with are safe and will not cause them any harm. I understand the urgency to protect the children of this country from high levels of lead and stop the ridiculous recalls. What I do not understand is why these new regulations were passed with such carelessness that it requires testing for products that have virtually NO risk of lead contamination! Products like clothing, blankets, wooden toys and books! The CPSIA is essentially causing many small businesses that make products for children under the age of twelve to close up shop because of their haste in passing regulations that have an insane amount of loopholes. Congress decided that a problem caused by ridiculous and irresponsible mass-market toymakers should be solved with a solution that sucks in various other industries that are completely unrelated to toys!
Later on when the kids and I were checking out the two women approached me and asked for my business card because they wanted to tell their friends about my clothing line. I smiled and tried to explain to them as plainly as possible that as of February 10th I would be officially closing up shop because of the Consumer Product Safety Improvement Act . Shockingly they were outraged that they hadn’t heard of it. That they felt their rights as consumers were being taken away. That the deadline is so close and there isn’t a media outrage over it. That more small businesses are being shut down and allowing the big companies to triumph. We exchanged information, I gave them my card and they said they would be writing whoever they needed to and be in contact with me. They weren’t business owners who are effected by this nor were they parents but they were as equally outraged as most of us that have to close our shops.
The apathy that I have seen from the general public and even those that own small businesses and are not effected by the new regulations have saddened me until I spoke with these two women. They were absolutely right! This does not just hurt my business. This hurts everyone no matter if they have children or not. No matter if they have a business selling products to children under twelve or selling something that, thankfully for them, does not have to be burdened with the CPSIA. Why don’t more people care?
I loaded up the kids, put my groceries in the trunk and at that moment it finally hit me. Something I started as a side business for extra cash in hand and as a creative outlet was taken from me. Just when my business started to take off it was ripped from my hands, discarded and no real explanation for it. I sell clothes. Not jewelry. Not toys. Not anything that has been manufactured overseas or injected with lead. I design, cut, iron, serge, stitch and package every item of clothing myself. To comply with these regulations each product I made would have to be tested which means each individual component of the garment would have to be tested for lead. A 15$ onesie now costs 400$ to make simply because of the testing fees! I put sleepless nights into marketing plans, helping Etsy teams and writing blogs to help the handmade market. There is no reason for so many of us to be swept out of the way because some major corporations wanted to cut their overhead costs and put MY children in danger. I stood there and cried in the parking lot. There is no reason why so many handmade artists look away at the pain so many of us are going through simply because they are not in the same boat.
Do something. The children in this country need to be protected but by regulations that target only the products that can cause potential harm. If you don’t do it for yourself and your business, or your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews or friend’s kids then do it for the sake of what’s right and stop being silent and a doormat in our society.
http://www.change.org/ideas/view/save_handmade_toys_from_the_cpsia
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/economicimpactsofCPSIA/index.html
http://nationalbankruptcyday.com/
http://www.handmadetoyalliance.org/
Read MoreDorian is finally going to a dentist!
I am sure you have all noticed in Dorian’s photos it looks like he has been eating blueberries or I don’t know, drinking battery acid.
Well, we had been needing to go in for that, because the asshole dentist we went to last year said unless he is in pain, they wont do anything about baby teeth anyway. Wrong, guess again.
So his first tooth fell out a while ago, and I started a search for a dentist who a) takes our insurance and b) sees children.
I finally called the ins this morning and they found one who would see him (everyone I phoned either said under 5 or over 10) so we have an appointment for next Monday. One of his lower baby teeth is loose, but not out, and the adult tooth is coming in very crooked and very behind it. We’re going to have that taken care of it (the tooth in question is loose but not loose enough to come out easily) and let them take a look-see at the rest of his mouth and maybe make an appointment. The next check up appt wasn’t available until the end of May, but because of that tooth they got him in. I was just going to make an appt for the end of May for him as well, however they told me over the phone to just see what the doc has to say and maybe we’ll be going again a little bit sooner.
Yay!! Dorian got his dads teeth, in other words, weak and crumbly, thank goodness we are getting it taken care of and thank goodness the other two kids got my strong horseteeth lol
Read More08 December 2004
Not even reading my friends page right now. I might later.
Saw the jack ass, erm, midwife today. Here is a pretty complete list:
Things she told me I already knew:
- the baby is transverse.
- my blood pressure is pretty low (it was something like 104/54 I think)
- my pulse was pretty high (I think she counted it at 96)
- my urine was dark this morning. Um, maybe b/c I had already used the bathroom, drank a half a yogurt drink and no water.
- I am measuring at 31. Which is right where I am. Go figure.
- I’ve gained approx. 15 pounds, maybe 20 depending on how accurate my starting weight was.
Things I didn’t know:
- the baby’s heart rate was about 140, IIRC.
Oh, yah, and I have to take some class (more money) but next appt I need to tell her I can’t, b/c my mom can’t afford it. It’s to cover what happens at home in the event of an emergency vs. in a hospital and some other bullshit (relaxation techniques, how to birth a baby, etc..) I told her I’ve had two kids, women have been doing this for about a million years, it hasn’t changed. So due to money, time and the feeling of she is a fucking rip off, I need to get out of that.
She also wants to do her back up plan next appt. Well, she is my moms back up plan, and I don’t need her. So we’ll see what comes of that.
While I’m there, and right after, I had a feeling of dread. She is stealing something from me. Something I will never be able to get back. Right now, I feel like I did last night, that she is not there for me, she is there for my mom and dad, and I don’t need her, and don’t need to call her. So I just don’t know. I wish I was strong enough to tell my mom to fuck off and I don’t need her. It’s funny. I am strong enough to have this baby by myself, but not strong enough to satisfy my mom I am safe in my strength.
Took the boys to a Chanukah party today with a moms group I recently joined. Great group of ladies. A little more mainstream in many ways than I am, but hey, we can’t all be the same, right? They were very well behaved, a big concern of mine since most of the kids in the group are under 18 months, if not under 9 months. Only a few are older than 2, and only one older than Dorian, who is 7. We had latkes, jelly doughnuts, crackers & cheese, and other foods, and did a toy exchange. Dorian got a tool set, and his face just lit up. He wouldn’t even let the box out of his hands, let alone out of his sight, the rest of the party. They fell asleep within about five minutes of getting into the car to come home. Dor woke up as soon as I took him out of the car asking where his tools were, Chai slept another hour and a half or so.
I am exhausted. I have to pick my love up from work at 9, and hopefully can come home and get in bed!
We got checks in the mail today from my grandparents. I cannot believe what they sent (individually it wasn’t a lot each, but to send it to all four of us seemed excessive, coupled with the fact that they sent the same to my brother & sister, and probably to all the grandchildren, so they spent a small fortune just sending out checks). i asked my mom if she thought they would even cash a check if I sent one back to them, and she suggested taking them out to dinner. Probably wiser, but I know they need that money right now, so I wish they would take a check/cash/whatever. I think tomorrow I will call to say thank you and make plans to go up next Sunday night or Monday, and see if they will let us take them out to dinner. I might see about leaving the boys with my parents so it’s not a *loud* dinner lol
Read More07 November 2004
Well, last Tuesday evening Chai was diagnosed with dual ear infection. yesterday, Dorian woke up complaining his ear hurt, but the doc office said to give him some motrin & tylenol (um, bad advise, btw, should have been or, not and) and see how he is in the morning. Well, around 11 pm last night he woke up complaining of it again, and I took him in this morning. He has a blister on his ear drum (I have no clue, but she did not say infection, she specifically said blister) that looked awful. She asked if we had a cold/virus and well, we’ve been passing a mucousy virus around for about a month now. No one has had it at the same time, no one we have been in contact with has caught it (meaning my family hasn’t gotten it, my grandparents, no one at dh’s work, etc… ) we just can’t get it out of the apt. So maybe it was related *shrugs*
Oh, and apparentely it looks nasty enough they wnt to see him back in three weeks to make sure it’s cleared up. I don’t remember if I mentioned it, but we did put tea tree in it yesterday, which couldn’t hurt him any, but given how advanced i sounded, it wouldn’t have helped either.
So my wonderfully healthy children both manage to get nasty sick within a few months of one of them starting school. To quote a favourite line of mine, “There’s a big surprise. I think I am going to have a heart attack and die of not surprise.” Even more amusing, none of the kids in his class have been out sick, so someone is using school as daycare. I hate that. I have kept him home because he is a little sniffly so it doesn’t get passed around, I expect other parents to have the same sense of responsibility of not spreading illness.
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