Doctors appointment went well today. She’s perfect. Went to breakfast after (one bagel with creamcheese, one order of challah french toast) and then off to school. Had her party on last Sunday so this evening will be relaxed. Miss thing asked for cheese cake cuplettes, and they were a hit. I suspect they have edged out FairyCakes for FavoriteBirthdayCupcake.

In ten years we have moved a handful of times, and always found ourselves back in South Florida, in the home we are in now. We’ve been through two major illnesses, two deaths. We’ve seen so much more happiness – babies being born, grades being graduated, events being celebrated.

I am not really feeling over philosophical today. I am not reminiscing. I find myself looking forward, which is, I suppose, a good thing. In the past six months, Dor has been able to go play on his own, help look after his siblings, help around the house more. It’s a goodness. We picked up a cheap phone for him yesterday, mainly because he is off in the neighborhood on his own and doesn’t always hear when we shout for him. When I was ten I was all over too, with no phone, but times, they are a changing. Yep, growing up.

I lied. I guess I am waxing philosophical. Ten years down, another seven or eight to go before it’s time for college. I just sent two off to college… the next eight years will fly by. I need to stop, slow down, and cherish them. I bet you do too.

Before the end of January, I completed my first tattoo. It was smaller than a quarter, but it fulfilled my own requirement of doing this before the end of January. I know it was stupid, but this has been going on for two years, and I told myself if I wasn’t ahead of where I was last year, or the year before, that was it. So Michael let me do a cute piece Malachai drew a bit ago and I don’t feel so much pressure from myself now. Phew!

We went to Orlando (Disney) in January as well, both to celebrate with Michael and Sara who turned 18 and to celebrate Eshiva turning 5. It was a super quick overnight trip, so we didn’t make plans to visit with anyone. She had a blast. She got her birthday pin and heaven forbid anyone not say Happy Birthday to her – she made damn sure they saw her pin lol

Dorian went to the orthodontist and he goes back the end of March to get his braces. Malachai hasn’t started his yet, but we’re getting there! He goes back I think the end of this month.

I went to the periodontist and had a gum therapy transplant thingie done yesterday. I am slightly better than miserable but not entirely well. It was a stupid nothing and I am surprised it took so much out of me. I put the details behind a spoiler tag for those who don’t want to hear. It’s not so bad, but it’s not so good either.

Next Tuesday I have a filling to be done and a spackle job (I have a tooth with an imperfection she wants to smooth over, it’s always been there though *shrugs*) and sometime near the end of March, when I am fully healed, I get to start braces. Yay! What stinks is I wouldn’t have had to do the surgery if I didn’t want braces. Yep.

I reapplied for FlaKidCare last night (I have to do this every year) and I am hoping our payment doesn’t go up.

Dorian made the A/B honor roll. Malachai got a citizenship award. Eshiva has strep. I think the boys made out better

We had a little birthday party for her on Sunday and all but one family called and said they couldn’t make it for one reason or another. I kind of felt like I did in jr high when I’d have a party and maybe 3 people would show up. It sucks. I’m buying cupcakes to take in tomorrow or thursday, depending on when she goes back.

Taxes came in, and went out just as quickly. The boys got their DSis, Eshiva got two new games for her Leapster (and will get a couple of hand-me-down Didj’s when the time comes). Michael got a new TV and is having some dental done and I replaced my laptop with a desktop. Camp for the kids is paid for (that was actually first before any purchases).

Dor starts music lessons on Monday! So I get this random ass phone call a couple weeks ago on a number I never give out. Whatever, I figure we wound up on a list from the school system (pretty much the onlyplace that has that number). So today Dor gets “interviewed” and I forked over a 45$ enrollment fee (good for all three kids) and Dor starts music lessons next week.

He chose guitar. He gets 6 weeks of basic lessons on a student guitar and I think we have to buy a better one after that. We’ve got a cheap Target one, but the guy said it looked like the student one. Whatever.

We pay 20.85 a week for 1/2 hour of private and he 3 hours of group lesson. Monday from 6 – 6:30 he’ll get private, and from 6:30 – 7 he’ll get group (the group is from 6 – 7 on Monday, 6 – 7 on Wednesday and 9 – 10 on Saturday). I think I’ll have Michael take him on Saturday.

I think he’s excited! They’ll teach him how to read and write music as well as how to play.

My gram isn’t doing so well, so I am kind of worried about that. They came out for E’s party, but left a little earlier than usual and she looked real bad.

I hate to end on a bad note, but I can’t remember what else is going on right now that is taking my attention away from here and landing it elsewhere. I’m tweeting, so that gets pumped to FaceBook. I haven’t found a way to pump it to here You’re probably happy about that lol It’s just easier b/c I can do it on the go from my phone. I’m not even really blogging – this will probably get copy/pasted over to my blog just so I have a record of it there too.

Ah, to end on a good note, 5 things I am happy about right now:

• We’re going to Melting Pot on Monday
• Other than some achiness I am healthy
• the kids are doing well in school
• My husband loves me more every day and always lets me know
• I’ve got some work coming in – always nice to have a little extra money!

Oh, we all have strep this week (boo), Eshiva turned 5 yesterday, I bet there is more, but I’m drawing a blank.

Last week Sara was talking downstairs and I swore it was mom. I don’t hear her in my own voice, although I hear her in my words. I was pleasantly surprised to find her in Sara’s.

Eshiva has been crying lately, because when she grows up her daddy is going to die. I think Michael is upset because she only says it about him… which is weird because I still have my dad. You would think she would be upset that when she grows up her mommy is going to die. Then she starts crying because she misses Aunt Erin (whom she never met). So we have this whole long conversation about how our bodies are healthy and strong because we eat right and exercise and take care of them, and we aren’t dying anytime soon because our bodies work. Is is terrible that it was easier with the boys, because they saw death up close and personal, and were better able to understand it even though it is usually so abstract to children? They had something to apply it to and bring it away from the abstract to the concrete. I am at a loss as to how to handle it better with Eshiva, because she hasn’t seen it – she is borrowing worries, and I understand they are very very real to her… I don’t know how to ease them because death is still an abstract to her.

We’re headed to Orlando on Sunday to spend the twins belated birthday trip with them, and staying on Monday as a pre-birthday trip for Eshiva. Money is tight, but when isn’t it?

I went to the dentist yesterday. 119$ later and my teeth have been thoroughly x-rayed, photographed, cleaned, poked and prodded. I have an periodontist appointment next week. Then I have another cleaning in four weeks. Then, if the perio gives me the all-clear I can start with the orthodontist. If not… I think I’ll just stick with quarterly cleanings and hope for the best. The dentist was talking about gum transplants and other expensive-sounding things. She also said I was in a grey area where it could be ok, or it could be a problem, but it isn’t currently one or the other. I cannot start orthodontia until I find out which it is. Hopefully the periodontist has good news and not bad.

Fucker took it as me asking him to cover our hotel WHICH I WAS NOT DOING and which I made sure he understood later. He spent the rest of dinner asking me which hotel I was looking at and I kept telling him I didn’ tknow yet b/c I wasn’t sure what money looked like. I was going to pick one when we got there and see who gave us the best price. At the least I wanted like 100$ to cover a dump somewhere on 192 or to get a campground and set up the tent at Ft Wilderness lol

So I picked a hotel, a new one I’ve never stayed at, and figured he was going to call and see what price he could get and let me know (he had asked me to call and tell them we were Fla resident/season passholders and whatnot). We left to go bowling (it was Sunday) and I get a call at the alley and he’s telling me I have reservations. So I spent ten minutes explaining I wasn’t asking him to bankroll my freaking birthday trip. He asked if we had money for food for that weekend. I give up.

So we have reservations for the Coranado in November and he got the damn room for 117$ (tax included) a night. In other words, it wasn’t much more than the Clarion or Wyngate or a nicer (but not 4/5 star) room down on 192. I don’t feel as guilty over him paying for the room.

We’re headed to Orlando in November, just the two of us! We were looking at the Keys, but… I’m not really a drinker, and neither of us love the beach, so it seemed kind of silly to head that way.

Where to start…  we went to Orlando this past weekend. Sorry local gals – we went up in one car and I knew I wouldn’t be able to get away so I didn’t even bother posting about it. I will be uploading pictures at some point, so expect a photo spam post.

We hit Animal Kingdom (something we almost never do), MGM (excuse me, Disney’s Hollywood Studios) & Magic Kingdom. We were up early enough to see them *open* on both Sunday & Monday. Not. In. Years. It was a real treat for the kids. We left around 2 PM on Monday and were home around 6PM (hit those rain storms headed up and back).

We’ll be back up in Sept or Oct, the boys want to stay at Wilderness Lodge – we’ll see. That will depend on if the work I am expecting comes through and a few other things as well. It’s their birthday trip, so I usually try to keep them in on the plans and such.

Tuesday morning we had M’s IEP. All is well. Again, we won’t know until the year starts if he gets his aid in the classroom for next year, but I hope so. Some goals were met, some are the same and we added some new ones. His speech went from being a profound delay at last years IEP to a mild, age appropriate delay. Whoo Fucking Hoo Mal! Our private speech gal is going to have her work cut out for her to keep him as a client, but I love her and she’s really awesome and I attribute most of his success to her. She said his /r/ sound really, really needs work   I hope she can find a legitimate reason to keep him. He performs well in the speech room, but not as well outside. I think that alone means he should keep it up.

Tuesday night he was supposed to read a story he wrote at Barnes & Noble. I have video. It didn’t go well. He was all ready to read, went up there, and froze. Poor kid. I sat with him, and tried to convince him to read. No go.

Wednesday I got my hair done. My girl went in at 8AM for me! She is a peach. I was done by 10 and we went to Target (aka that vast time suck) and bought a box storage thing for outside for my new seat cushions, a couple of fans and some misc. other things we probably didn’t need at all. Wed afternoon is therapy with all the kids, where they act like animals and irritate the fuck out of me. Then we had dinner with my moms twin brother, his wife and their daughter. We almost never see them (they live in Reno) and my dad is still livid he didn’t bother to come out when mom was dying (and by the time he was going to come out he told him not to bother, there was no time and we’ll see you at the funeral in a few days. Fucker.). I told my Gram not to expect me to rearrange my entire day for family who doesn’t really want to see us again as I had to break a promise to Dorian to make dinner at a reasonable time.

Today I have been working, just dropped Fish off at work, and I am uploading pictures from, well, all of May. I’ll be making a few photo posts later on. It’s going to take all day to upload.

Our fence is complete! They will come out tomorrow or Monday to inspect it. It’s pouring now, so I can’t go enjoy it lol We’re having a party on Sunday, so just in time! I hope it doesn’t rain I think I “scheduled” it in between rain storms lol

Dor has his first sleepover weekend after next, so that’s exciting. We need to go get him some PJs and a gift to take with him.

And I think that’s everything!

Whoot, I found out how to delete my MySpace. The deed is done.

Michael gave me an idea for a new tattoo earlier today. I need to think on it. I am in literary lust with Heinlein and his characters. I have a couple of small pieces planned, a TANSTAAFL and a GROK on the insides of my wrists. He mentioned today I could stand to do them more justice and do a big thigh piece revolving around my favourite Heinlein stories/characters. I agree, but I am still getting the smaller ones inside of my wrists. They just belong there. the TANSTAAFL is going to be an a stylized kind of Russian writing and the GROK is the GROK off of Stranger in a Strange Land. The piece would have to include Stranger in a Strange Land, Time Enough for Love, Cat Who Walks Through Walls, Moon is a Hard Mistress, Job: A Comedy of Justice, To Sail Beyond the Sunset, Methuselah’s Children… Oh, this list goes on. I may have to go with a main “cast” of characters. I’ve been thinking on it all afternoon though. Not a bad idea you had there, Fish, not a bad idea at all.

Malachai has his IEP meeting at the end of the month. He has been recommended for second grade. We’ll see what kind of services he’ll get next year.

My half birthday was yesterday. My dreads are about five months old. If December first rolls around and I want to cut them off… off they go! I’ll give them a year I have one in the back, twice as long as the others. The roots are dreaded, and the tip is dreaded, but I could brush everything in between. The rest are all in good shape. I need to get in to see Chrissy to be dyed again, and I need to go see Strawberry for some maintenance. I don’t really want to do either, mainly because I am dandruffy and the dreads just trap it. I’m not so much embarrassed as… ew.

Mothers Day is coming up. I think we should thank the people that mean the most to us everyday (actually, I think we should be happy and pleasant and say please and thank you to everyone every day, and I try to) so I’m not so much looking for breakfast in bed or lavish gifts or anything. I have a picnic in the park planned for the afternoon with (I hope) some other families we like, and then I am going to see if Sara and/or Michael will keep the kids so we can go into the shop for a little bit.

We set up the sewing machine. It may have a permanent home. Maybe we’ll use it more. What a novel idea.

I have a rotting melon in the fridge. Michael brought home/in the tattoo equipment. I just suck. That melon has been in the fridge a month at least. I wonder if I am avoiding it because I feel like I suck, or if I just don’t care as much as I thought I did. Interesting question to ask myself, no? I wanted it so bad… I’d hate to find out I suck. Not that every beginner sucks kind of suck, but really and truly suck at something I love so much. Something that is so important to my life and my well being and the well being of my family. Think I am being overly dramatic? I don’t. Tattoos feed and clothe us. I’d hate to find out that I stink at giving them. There is a total connection in my head.

We bought a new composter at BJs yesterday. As soon as the fence is up we’re going to dump the old compost into the new bin. I think we’ll just use the old compost bin as a trashcan. Speaking of the fence! The permits were denied because we need to add onto the paperwork that if the fence is black we don’t have to landscape (I want to anyway, but at least we wont be on a deadline) and we need to fax the approval from the HOA because we’re fencing in the easement. We’ll take care of that tomorrow.

But my baby turned four. She is right around the corner from not needing me home all day long. She is far from not needing me, I am aware of that. It’s just different with her than it was with the boys.

I know she is the last one. I enjoyed her babyhood more. I wasn’t chasing after a toddler, or missing out on toddler things because I was looking after a baby. I was not looking after someone who was sick and/or dying. I wasn’t moving (ok, we moved a few times) or packing/unpacking for months at a time (we stored the unpacked boxes).

I didn’t do anything for this birthday. We have no friends with young children (indeed, we have no friends) and she isn’t in any programs and therefore had no little friends to invite. My dads mom and sister came over. My moms parents were in Naples – we’re going to go see them next weekend. We had steak and knishes and salad and trifle and cake. We took her out to sushi the next day, because the plumber was here on her actual birthday.

I convinced her she really is four, and today convinced her that her birthday is over, but she is still four. I took some photos (which I haven’t unloaded).

And that was that.

Next year, school? Maybe, maybe not. Apparently VPK is only a 3 hour day through the public school. What a waste of time. I may keep her home. She doesn’t make the cut off for K next year.

Of course, the family also claims they aren’t white supremacists, just proud of their German heritage. That’s why one of the other kids is Whatever Aryan Nation Whateverthelastnameis and the other kids middle name is Himler. WTFEver people. He also has swastikas all over the house and the whole thing is just creepy.

You can’t help but feel sorry for the kids. They are going to grow up to believe this or normal behaviour.

No, I don’t want people to forget about Adolph Hitler and the horrible things he, and Dr. Mengele, and Eva and all his cronies did. As soon as we forget, it will happen again. I don’t want to be rounded up and starved and worked and gassed and stuck in a mass grave. I don’t want to be torn away from my babies, my husband, my family. I also don’t want people who still believe in that bullshit to be allowed to breed. Then again, I suppose there are people who don’t think I should be allowed to breed, and I think my kids are smart and well adjusted, so it’s a stand off I guess.

Turns out there was a follow up to the story. Twelve children attended the birthday party, which had a cake, which was supplied by Wal*Mart. Well, good. The kids deserves a cake and a party. All kids do.

I cried last night, well, teared up at the least, because President Elect Obama’s grandmother wasn’t here to see him be the choice of the people. Because he was overwhelmingly the choice of the people. This wasn’t the “too close to count” race of 2000. This wasn’t the disappointment of 2004. This was an overwhelming outpouring of support.

He gave a speech worthy of ID4, a speech I hope they will be replaying for days, weeks, to come.

I haven’t written much on him. I truly believe he is our every man. We’ve elected someone who is young and has most of America’s interest at heart (most, because obviously, not everyone wants what he wants, I’m OK with that).

I am bowled over with happiness that McCain/Palin did not get this honor. Why? Their politics scare me. Their belief in god (big G, little g, it matters not) scares me. No god should be in charge of America. Look where it’s gotten us.

We may not see positive change this term (I would be shocked), but it is being set into motion. As early as today it is being set into motion.

I woke Dorian up last night because he wanted to stay up, but I knew it would be too late. I told him Mr. Obama won and will be our next president. I feel a little bit safer, better, more secure for my children’s futures today. It’s a little bit brighter outside. My heart is a little bit lighter.

Sure, sure. We as a people helped make history last night, but frankly, that would have happened either way (by way of a not 100% white man being elected, or by way of someone with a uterus being elected). What our country did was put aside most of it’s differences. What our country did was really take a look around and understand that we can’t keep on the path we’re on. So we’re going to veer a little bit now. We’ll head in the right direction yet.

My generation looked past the colour of that man’s skin. I cannot wait to what change the next generation brings, and the one after that.